If you’re an awkward girl (like me) you dread events. I’m not talking about a close friend’s party or lunch with your boyfriend, I’m talking about business lunches, house parties full of people you don’t know, intimate lectures and networking events. The kind of place where first impressions matter.
You might rely on your good humour but the truth is you’re awkward and probably clumsy, but at least you’ll be remembered. Here are 5 things every awkward girl goes through (from my personal experiences!)
#1 Food disasters
You arrive at the swanky business lunch without tripping or walking into the wrong room. You sit down to eat and you suddenly realise there is more than one fork, and some fancy bowl thing sitting opposite you. You awkwardly eyeball everybody to find out what’s the social norm. Good thing you didn’t try to eat that soupy stuff, it seems to be for dipping hand towels in! You’re also lucky enough to be the only one at the table whose dinner ends up on their chin and nose simultaneously. Everybody else feels awkward about it, and you won’t realise until your next bathroom trip. WIN!
#2 Doing a J-Law
Jennifer Lawrence is every awkward girl’s hero. She’s the queen of awkward falls, but it doesn’t help us feel any better about it. You know the drill by now, your sleeve/bag/pocket gets caught on the door, you miss a step, you trip over your own foot, whatever the reason you end up stumbling and sometimes falling in front of everyone. People look at you with sympathy, but they actually think you’re a liability.
#3 Saying the wrong thing
If you get us talking, you’ll be delighted to a story about our favourite pizza, a joke about the muddy trainers we accidentally wore not knowing this was a swanky event or being called by the wrong name. Maybe we’ll even treat you to a photo of our pet. We aren’t great at this networking thing.
#4 Constant panic
While you’re smiling and sipping your drink, there is a blind panic going on in your brain. A loud shouty voice is asking you if you have mascara on your eyeball or food in your teeth, plus you know you got a bit sweaty running in faux fur to get here on time, so your brain is telling you that you stink and everybody around you thinks you’re a mess. You constantly have to check your lips (for lip liner smudges or chocolate) and hair (for random unannounced back-combing) and everyone around you thinks you’re very self-conscious. You just know yourself.
There’s nothing worse than watching in horror as a glass slowly tumbles from the coffee table splashing red wine all over your boss’s freshly cleaned carpet. That’s you uninvited from the next get together then. Whether you laugh out loud and end up dribbling down your top, knock your glass over by complete accident or (even worse) knock a drink all over someone else, you know that you just don’t mix with liquids. Keep them at arm’s length!
Don’t worry if you’re an awkward girl, you’re not alone. We manage, and those around us just find it endearing. As long as you learn to laugh at yourself you’ll be fine! Do you have any other awkward moments to share? Pop them in the comments!
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