There’s a lot to think about when you hit your twenties, from career choices, post-graduate degrees and relationships to sustaining friendships and deciding what filter to put on your selfie. In this day and age there seems to be a lot more pressure on young people, hence the quarter-life crisis. It seems like a tough time, but it doesn’t have to be. If you stop believing these 8 lies, you’ll have a great time.
#1 “Everyone has got it together except for me!”
It’s tempting to look around and see everybody knowing what they want to do, see friends and family hitting their targets and talking with a passion that you’ve never had about their chosen career or field, and feel disheartened. Lacking passion or drive is a common symptom of the twenties, you’re figuring it all out and you need to give yourself a break. Half the people you think have it together could be having a miserable time at work and having to reevaluate their whole lives. You are definitely not the only one who feels lost and doesn’t know the direction their life is going in. You still have years and years ahead of you to figure it out.
#2 “I need more experience”
Sometimes it’s true, but there’s only so much experience firms can ask for. Don’t be discouraged from applying to somewhere because they’ve asked you for lots of proven experience, if you have some experience and a desire to make it, you can make sure your CV and cover letter does the talking for you. Check out our guide on avoiding gaps in your CV if you need to write a CV that covers up gaps in experience. Plus, you can lean on life experiences to prove you’re a great candidate, travel, courses, lectures and education are all great things to have under your belt.
#3 “Nothing in life comes for free!”
For some reason, all the proper grown ups we know say this one a lot. Maybe they’re disillusioned and haven’t yet seen the power of the internet. A lot of things on the internet come for free, actually. You can watch videos, talk to people all over the world, borrow books, download free resources, the possibilities are endless. That’s not to mention that kindness is free and comes with NO PRICE! A lot of the work I’ve done in my life has been for free, it’s just the way it is on the internet, especially if you’re a writer. The idea that nothing comes for free is quite a negative one, it connotes that you should always ask for a price and also that others will always want something from you. That’s no way to live! Of course, you can’t walk into a store and walk out with clothes or jewellery for free, but some things absolutely do come for free, and you should make the most of giving and receiving!
#4 “I’m too old for this!”
A lot of people I know who are ridiculously young by today’s standards roll out this saying every time anything remotely taxing happens, partying, dancing and being silly are all things that you should never grow out of. I’ve even heard myself saying it on a particularly bad hangover day, but remember you’re only as young as you feel and there are some 90 year old people out there that have just started skydiving. Crazy.
#5 “I have to be independent”
No, you don’t. You really don’t. You can stay in your family home while you save money for your own place, you can talk to friends and family and reveal your struggles to them, you never have to be on your own and you definitely don’t have to pretend everything’s perfect. You have time for everything right now, you have time to indulge yourself and you have time to try to balance all the areas of your life, you don’t have to do those things alone. If you’re worried about something or if you’re nervous, let people know, everyone needs a helping hand.
#6 “I should already have my career by now”
Yeah, some successful people are already in their dream jobs, but you aren’t one of them. You’re obviously doing something wrong, right? No, you aren’t. Don’t rush these things, once you’re in your dream job, you’ll be thankful for the years of struggle that you spent buying doughnuts and being silly. Stop putting pressure on yourself, if you really want it to happen it will, but you must be dedicated and accept that the path to success is long and littered with setbacks.
#7 “There’s time for that later”
A lot of people are so focused on work they forget to nurture themselves and take time having fun. There might not be time for fun later if you’re in your dream job position and juggling family life with a career, even if you never have kids you might still find yourself retiring without ever travelling or doing things you’d always wanted to. Take a chance now, there’s time. Join a free society or do something completely wacky that you’ve always wanted to. The experience will help shape you into someone who values fun in their business life.
#8 “So-and-so is doing better than me!”
Thanks to Facebook we can see all our old school friends having babies, getting married or moving into their dream careers. Some of them have completed a masters by the time we’ve stopped wearing pyjamas all day, but it doesn’t mean they’re doing better than you. Who can measure what ‘better’ is exactly, anyway? You’re judging yourself by a few pictures and words on a website, or a few positive stories told, you don’t know the struggles or the negatives of their lives. Ask yourself how you would look if you shared only staged photos that showed the very best of your life, I’m sure someone out there would be comparing themselves to you and feeling envious, too.