Learning How To Say ”No”: 5 Tips That Will Make It Easier

“Could you please do this for me? Right now … I need it back in about an hour! ” your colleague asks. You look at your own to-do list and think ”I really don’t have time for this, so no I can’t help you”, but instead of actually saying it out loud, you say ”Yes, sure! Not a problem, will get it done as soon as possible” and the minute that is out, you immediately regret it, want to punch yourself in the face (yes, I really have those extremes) and take it back, but you can’t because that would be unprofessional.


Why do we find it so difficult to say no? Is it because we want people to like us and we think that saying no will make us less likable?

Saying no in a way that the other person actually gets that it is a ”no!” and not a ‘vague’ no, is often much more appreciated and makes you sometimes even more likable. In the end, we all love an honest and straight forward person, so learning how to say no is actually a good thing!

CGD gives you 5 tips on how to say no, that will help you to become that person we all appreciate so much:

#1 – Be clear

I am one of those people who gives you a ‘vague’ no, and always say no without actually using the word. It is important that you do not twist it around and say no directly. The other person deserves to have clarity and will appreciate it way more if you are honest and clear from the start.

#2 – Bring it convincingly

See #1, do not use words of doubt like: maybe, actually or it depends on…

#3 – Stay positive

Even though, you say no, bring it positively. If there is anything you can help with mention it and also explain why you can’t help the person at the moment.

#4 – Stick with your first argument

When a person keeps pushing you to change your answer to yes, always stick with your first argument. Don’t make stuff up or twist it around, be clear on the reason why you said no and stick with that.

#5 – Stop the pusher

Pushers are the worst kind of people (unless it is pushing for a better you or cause). If the person keeps pushing you to do something you said no to, simply tell the person to stop pushing and tell them you have a very busy schedule, so really don’t have time to argue with them on why you said no in the first place.

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Credit: Het effectief werken

  • http://tonightisyoung.blogspot.com Yulia Yurasova

    Something we often feel too much unnecessary guilt about.. great post — and quite an inspiring lifestyle blog!

  • Anceeta

    So many people need to follow this. Being doormat helps no one. Others don’t value you and at the end of the day, you are burnt out.


  • http://www.trudyjohanna.co.uk/ Trudy

    this is such a good post and will help a lot of people needing the advice x

  • http://www.brittonloves.co.uk Lauren

    Totally agree with being strong and clear on a point – if you stand firm then no one can shake you

    Lauren x
    Britton Loves | Lifestyle Food Beauty

  • Rhonda Howard

    I NEVER commit on the spot. I have used a couple of techniques that have really worked beautifully.
    1) Even if you think you want to do it, say, “Let me get back to you on that.” Sometimes I have said yes and regretted it later. This gives you some time to think through it.
    2) “Thank you for thinking of me; I just don’t have time to do the job well.”
    “Thank you for thinking of me, but no. I can’t do it.”

    #2 is especially effective. It really throws the person asking.
    Never feel guilty for saying no. There are plenty of things we can’t get out of… some of those family commitments, but our time is just as important as anyone else’s. What is important to you – your kids, your pets, your walks, your books, your work, your TIME… whatever it is, it is important. I’d rather say no than spend hours or days thinking negative thoughts about myself or the person who asked me.
    Life is short!

  • http://www.stitchedtheblog.co.za Iptishaam Davids

    Lovely post! Loved the “stop the pusher” advice.



  • http://shesnext.com She’s Next

    No matter how much we want to make others happy, at the end of the day it all boils down to how we feel. The best advice anyone can ever give you is to learn to listen to your instincts and say no when you’re reluctant, even just a little bit.

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  • http://justsem.wordpress.com/ The Queen of Dreaming

    Great post! I’ve learned to say no in the past few years, before I was really into helping everyone who asked, forgetting to help myself first!


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